OPENING DAY

By Clyde Hawkins

Opening day is right around the corner folks! The New York Mets will travel to San Diego to take on the Padres for the first three games of the season. The projected matchup will feature Mets ace Rick Reed (13-9, 2.89 era) vs Joey Hamilton (12-7, 4.25 era). First pitch at 2:05, from Qualcomm Stadium.

Nerves are running high for both managers. Graham was reached for quote at the Mets practice facility: "Yup.... here we go, I think we're ready....no.......I KNOW we're ready, this is what we train for folks" "We know what we have to do to win....and we're ready"

Toeing the rubber for the visiting Mets, Rick Reed will have to attack the lineup early- trying to avoid the Padres big bat threat Tony Gwynn (.372 avg, 17 HR, 119 rbi)... WOW!!! "Yeah.....were completely aware of what hes capable of" Graham said. "No [expletive deleted] idea how we're going to attack him, hes an incredible talent."

The Padres Joey Hamilton will have his hands full as well, battling a lineup with good power at several different positions. Olerud....Hundley...Gilkey, they'll all  take you deep if you leave one up in the zone or make a mistake. The Mets are also solid defensively, no more so then on the left side of the infield which features Edgardo Alfonzo and Rey Ordonez. (Both 1 fielders)

It has all the makings for an exciting day of baseball. These days only happen once a year in baseball, lets sit back and enjoy.

WHAT A DOPE!!

By Clyde Hawkins

New manager Eric Graham (Pictured left, with Tigers manager Mat McNeil) has gotten off to a shaky start. He has failed a preliminary drug test required upon entry to the league. Report say the test came up positive for THC.

Mets officials were reached for comment earlier today. "We're terribly dissapointed, but we're not hanging our heads over it. We want everyone to know we still support him 100%, despite his questionable decisions", GM Joe McIlvaine reports.

Graham was also reached at his household for comment: "Shit who cares.... I seen tha pic, eyes bloodshot, stoned...fuck it. Weed aint dangerous fellas', aint snortin powder or nothin, aint really see tha big deal" The league has yet to come down with a disciplinary action for the skipper, if there is one at all, but hopefully he's not lightin up in the clubhouse before games, or we might be seeing some weird [expletive deleted] go down on the field this season.

Players  were quick to jump to Grahams rescue. Todd Hundley weighed in on the issue: "Shit I take steroids and ya'll dont bust me....." Its good to know the players havent turned yet. Lets hope he can get clean by opening day.